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Post by MW on Jun 24, 2005 12:08:39 GMT -5
For the uninitiated, here's a non-Bendis dialogue version of the first issue of House of M.
PROF X: Oh shit, Scarlet Witch is crazy. I should probably kill her. MAGNETO: But she's my daughter. PROF X: Oh. Shit.
WONDER MAN: We used to be Avengers, but now there are new Avengers. CAROL DANVERS: Yes, we did. And yes, there are.
PROF X: Oh shit, the X-Men are here. X-MEN: Yeah, you abandoned us. PROF X: No shit? Look, The Scarlet Witch is crazy. We might have to kill her.
QUICKSILVER: Dad! They said at a meeting I wasn't even at that they're going to kill Scarlet Witch! She's my sister! MAGNETO: She is also my daughter.
WOLVERINE: Kill her. CAPTAIN AMERICA: No. PROF X: She's crazy as shit, though. DR. STRANGE: I'm absolutely no help here at all. SPIDER-MAN: Look, I'm just a normal guy. CAROL DANVERS: Hey! Let's go see Scarlet Witch.
CYCLOPS: So, here we are in Genosha. PROF X: Oh shit, Scarlet Witch, who is crazy, isn't where she's supposed to be. IRON MAN: Let's go somewhere else. WHITE QUEEN: Why not a church?
SPIDER-MAN: Hey, I'll go in the church, I'm just a normal guy after all. Oh shit! A page of white light! And now I'm married to Gwen Stacy. PROF X: Oh shit.
Seriously, Professor X is constantly surprised. He can read minds, though.
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Post by BG on Jun 26, 2005 10:52:22 GMT -5
Could you please do a version of this for every big, over-hyped crossover event from comics?
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Post by MW on Jun 29, 2005 18:47:07 GMT -5
Issue #2: - Captain America is old now
- Cyclops and White Queen live together
- Mary Jane's a movie star
- The Fantastic Four are dead
- Wonder Man's famous
- Carol Danvers is the most famous hero in America
- Gambit's a crook
- Kitty Pryde's a teacher
- Falcon's a detective
- Luke Cage is some kind of crime boss
- Somebody beat up Wilson Fisk
- Dr. Strange is a psychologist
- Colossus pulls a thresher
- Hank Pym and Henry McCoy are still scientists
- Storm's a socialite
- The Wasp is her assistant
- Wolverine's boning Mystique and is part of something sort of like SHIELD, but uses an "M" logo
No plot is advanced.
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